RX: Bedroom feng shui for a happy sex life

Do you often toss and turn in bed at night, unable to sleep and waking up feeling worn-out? Are you losing sleep worrying about how to keep the sex alive in your marriage? Do you want to lure your straying partner back to your bed?

This brings us to a very intimate topic — so intimate that what happens here, stays here. But of course, I’m talking about the bedroom and the role feng shui plays in it. As you probably know, feng shui or Chinese geomancy uses energy forces to get people attuned to their surrounding environment. Thus, for couples, bedded bliss can easily turn to blister if the energies of their bedroom are not conducive to a relationship.

“The bedroom is an important part of the house as it is considered one of the key areas of the home,” declares young feng shui expert Princesse Lim-Fernandez, an alumna of the Ateneo de Manila University.  “The bedroom is a room not just for sleeping but also for relaxing and recharging, for recreation and procreation (particularly for the master’s bedroom). Thus, the energies of this room should be conducive to these purposes and, most especially, to nurturing and fostering the relationship between the couple. Therefore, regardless of the current year — be it the Year of the Earth Pig, Golden Rat, etc., the bedroom is a key area in feng shui and should be given proper attention.”

What’s a good feng shui bedroom?
According to www.thespruce.com, “A good feng shui bedroom is one that promotes a harmonious  flow of nourishing, vibrant and sensual energy. It invites you, lures you in, excites and calms at the same time. It is fun and pleasurable to be in, whether you›re there for a quick nap, a good night›s sleep or to make passionate love.”

Indeed, today, the bedroom is «another living area of the home,» write Neil Bingham and Andrew Weaving in the book Modern Retro. “Bedrooms are places of fantasy, and their furnishing and decoration a very personal affair. Some people opt for tranquility in an attempt to induce restfulness and relaxation, while others choose bright colors and wild patterns to provide a backdrop to unbridled pleasures.”

For good feng shui, limit the pictures and paintings in the bedroom to abstract subjects, landscapes or pictures of the couple and their children.

Princesse offers some feng shui prescriptions to ensure a healthy and happy marriage/relationship:
1. First of all, do not mix work and pleasure (business and pleasure are strange bedfellows). It is best to avoid work in the bedroom (so no computer in the bedroom, please!). Allot another part of the house for any work that you may bring home so that the purpose of the bedroom is kept preserved.

2. Avoid having pictures of other people inside the bedroom. Limit the pictures and paintings in the bedroom to abstract subjects, landscapes or pictures of the couple and their children. The pictures or paintings in the bedroom should evoke happy memories for the couple. It could be a picture of the couple in their dream getaway/vacation spot.

3. Avoid putting water features and mirrors inside the bedroom to minimize the chances of inviting in a third party.

4. It is not advisable to have the marital bed under a beam. Because beams symbolize separation (if they appear between the bed’s occupants) and they represent health problems in the area of the body they bisect.

5. This tip is not just for couples to have a happy relationship but also for those who choose to be happily single: The bedroom should be neat, clean, clutter-free, and well-lit. Minimize the amount of furniture so that the energy (call it chi, ko, qi, prana or life force) could easily flow through the bedroom. It should also have several light settings. Daylight white for when the cleaning is done and warm white for other times of the day.
Upon waking up, curtains should be drawn and blinds raised to allow sunlight into the room.

Has Princesse helped couples by bringing the ancient art of feng shui into their bedrooms?
Certainly! She relates, “One couple had been to several doctors and medically, they were both fit to have a child. But seven years into their marriage, they had not been blessed with a baby. Since the problem was not medical, I rearranged the feng shui of their bedroom by moving their bed. Now, they have a four-year-old.”

Princesse Lim-Fernandez, feng shui expert, Yin and Yang Shop of Harmony, New World Makati Hotel: The bedroom is not just for sleeping but also for relaxing and recharging, for recreation and procreation.

Here’s another moving story: Another couple had a visit from the stork after Princesse checked the feng shui of their bedroom and recommended that the couple move to another bedroom.

Here are more tips on the best way to feng shui your bedroom (from www.thespruce.com)
1. Have a solid headboard. Have a good supporting wall behind your bed. No explanation needed.

2. Get a supportive mattress (you read that right, guys — it’s mattress, not mistress).

3. Make sure the bed is positioned as far from the door as possible. The foot of the bed shouldn’t point towards the door as this is called the coffin position. If this can’t be avoided, put a table or a footboard to act as a buffer without blocking the view of the door.

4. Make sure no sharp objects are pointing at you so as to avoid any attacking energy (called sha chi) directed at you while you’re sleeping.

5. Be smart and safe by positioning your bed away from the walls that have electrical appliances on either side. Of course, the best feng shui is to limit (or eliminate) the electrical appliances in your bedroom. So, no TV, cell phone, iPad, computer in the bedroom. By lowering the harmful EMFs in your bedroom, “your body will thank you and your intimate relationship will happen.”

6. Open your windows often and keep air in your bedroom fresh and clean as you can’t have good feng shui if the air you breathe is polluted.

7. However, note that plants in the bedroom are not good feng shui unless your bedroom is fairly large and the plants are placed far from the bed.

8. A good feng shui bedroom decor is a balanced one that “promotes the best flow of energy for restorative sleep as well as sexual healing.” The best feng shui colors are the so-called skin colors — from pale white to rich chocolate brown. Choose within this range that will work best for you.

9. Keep all bedroom doors closed at night (closet, ensuite bathroom doors, etc.) to allow the most nourishing flow of energy for your health as well as the health of your relationship.

10. Keep your bedroom closet clean and organized to further create a sense of peace and calm in your bedroom.
You think you don’t have a good feng shui bedroom? Fret not! Do it little by little and pretty soon, you would have created your own beautiful, blissful bedroom with all its loving, nurturing feng shui energy.
And so, to bed!