‘Being alone for a while is dangerous. It’s addicting.’
This quote, attributed to the actor Tom Hardy, pertains to the good side of solo living: you realize how peaceful it is to be by yourself because you don’t have to meet anyone’s expectations; you don’t have to worry about disappointing them; and you basically experience a slice of freedom not many people do.
Sure, it can get lonely sometimes, because you will miss speaking to an actual person and hearing another person’s voice. You have the freedom to laugh as loudly and as boisterously as you want, but no one is laughing with you.
It could be considered a sad thing, but it’s up to you to flip the narrative — you can make it a good thing.
Because living alone means mastering emotional regulation (and understanding your pet’s non-human responses to your kuwento).
Let’s talk about shared space
It’s Valentine’s Day, so I’ll stop talking about solo living. Let’s focus instead on sharing space with others – family, roommates, or partners.
I’ve been there so I happen to know that this can sometimes feel less like a Valentine’s Day card and more like a “wrestling match.”
No two people are the same, whether you are spouses or siblings. This means that a shared space could potentially breed conflict, misgivings, and resentment.
But these don’t have to define your shared living experience. With a lot of understanding and effort, you can transform your shared space into a haven of harmony where everyone feels loved and respected.
Communicate calmly
The first step towards resolving conflicts is open and honest communication. Aim for calm, respectful conversations.
Use “I” statements to express your feelings without blaming others. For example, instead of saying, “You’re always leaving your dishes in the sink!,” try, “I feel frustrated when dishes are left unwashed, as it makes the kitchen feel cluttered.”
Active listening is crucial; truly hear what the other person is saying before responding. Consider scheduling regular “family meetings” or roommate check-ins to proactively address concerns before they escalate into major arguments.
Be willing to compromise
Compromise is the cornerstone of harmonious cohabitation. It is about finding solutions that work for everyone, not just for one person.
This might involve creating a chore chart to ensure fair distribution of household tasks, establishing quiet hours to respect each other’s need for rest, or agreeing on shared spaces and personal boundaries.
Be willing to bend a little; it’s often easier to compromise on small things than to wage war over them.
Appreciate the small things
Creating a harmonious environment involves more than just resolving conflicts; it’s about fostering a sense of mutual respect and appreciation.
Small gestures of kindness can go a long way.
Leave a thoughtful note, offer to help with a chore, or simply express your gratitude for your shared living situation. Shared meals, game nights, or movie marathons can strengthen bonds and create positive shared memories.
Basically, if you have good words to say or good things you want to do, don’t hold back. These will program the energy in your space into a comforting, nurturing one.
Find your corner
Consider creating designated personal spaces within the shared home. Even a small corner or a shelf can provide a sense of ownership and privacy, reducing feelings of being overwhelmed or encroached upon.
Respecting each other’s belongings and personal space is fundamental.
This includes knocking before entering someone’s room, asking before borrowing something, and respecting individual preferences regarding tidiness and organization.
Maintaining harmony entails continuous effort. It is never-ending and -expiring communication, compromise, and mutual respect.
By prioritizing these, you can transform your shared space from a source of conflict into a loving and supportive home, where everyone feels appreciated and valued — a true testament to the power of love and harmony.
May your space abound with love today and every day.
